Actions Speak Louder than Words
by evalentine
Summary: Part One:All Fall Down. When your lover's actions continually demonstrate you come last in every aspect of their lives, is love enough for you to remain. This is Ianto's dilemma when he receives a job offer from Torchwood House.
1. Chapter 1

**Authors note: **This beginning of this story shares some similarities with 'Taking the Bullet' by marzipan77. Both stories were written independently and any similarities are strictly coincidental. Marzipan77 is aware of this fiction and has agreed to this disclaimer.

'Taking the Bullet' can be found on Live Journal.

Any unique story elements are copywrited to evalentine99

This Fan fiction has been created for enjoyment and is not for profit.

This begins with the cannon episode 'Meat" and then follows an alternate time line.

Note: Jack and Gwen Bashing.

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All Fall Down.

**Chapter One**

Pulling out the letter Ianto unfolded it carefully and read it again as he had multiple times over the last four weeks. He felt frustration course through him as he let out a deep breath because he was running out of time. He had put off trying to give an answer but his last extension had come with an ultimatum: accept or decline. He had to have a reply in two days or the offer would be rescinded. Sighing he folded it, placed it back in his top jacket pocket and headed for Jack's office. Making Jack a final mug of coffee, he noted Jack didn't look up as he entered. He placed the mug on his desk as Jack continued on with the paperwork in front of him.

"You said we could talk," Ianto said moving from foot to foot in an effort to control how nervous he felt.

"Jack." Ianto said a little louder to see Jack look up at him, irritated. "You said we could talk," Ianto repeated trying to keep his nerve.

"Sorry, remind me?" Jack asked as he returned to the task at hand.

"Earlier today, remember? I said I needed to talk to you about something…important," he tried to say as Jack looked at his watch to see how late it was, then paused.

"I did? Can this wait till tomorrow, I'm swamped," Jack told him not looking up then turned over the sheet in front of him.

"It's important," Ianto repeated as he pursed his lips.

"I heard it's important, and I promise tomorrow we will sit down and talk. Come into my office, say 10am and I'll set time aside," Jack said in annoyance as he continued to read.

Ianto looked at him, not sure if he could push the issue. Jack had been pushing him away and he had no idea where he stood with him; that was part of the problem. He went over his options as he observed Jack absorbed in the task before him.

"Okay. I'll come back then," he said as Jack picked up his pen and started writing. "Good night," Ianto said. He turned sadly as he let out a breath and left the office.

Several minutes later Jack looked to see Ianto had gone. He picked up the mug and took a sip of coffee and felt annoyed, 'a_t least he could have said good night,'_ he thought as he picked up another piece of paper and studied it. He wondered what Ianto had wanted; he should know better interrupting him when he had so much work. He thought for a moment and felt a tinge of guilt as he now recalled their conversation earlier that day. He looked at his watch and promised himself he would make it up to him tomorrow.

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Arriving home Ianto hung up his jacket and took out the letter again and spread it out on the coffee table. It was an offer from Torchwood House to come and work there. It represented a complete contrast to working at Torchwood Three. No fieldwork, and the opportunity to be leader of a team who were to compile Torchwood archives worldwide with the emphasis on artefacts.

There was possible travel overseas, regular hours, weekends, and an active social life which Torchwood House was famous for. Magda, another Torchwood One survivor who was working there had even come down to sing its praises. It was an incredible opportunity and he would have taken it in a heartbeat but for one thing: Jack. He had no idea where he stood with him.

Jack had returned from his absence claiming he was a changed man and promised he was going to make Ianto a priority in his life, but within weeks they had fallen back into exactly what they had before Jack had left. Jack had promised so much on his return and he kept hoping that Jack would actually follow through. Instead of a deepening of their relationship, Jack had grown completely dismissive. He was no fool, he could see something had happened to Jack while he was away but unless Jack opened up to in any small measure he couldn't help or understand.

All of Jack's good intentions seemed to have faded away and recently there had been two instances which had caused him to doubt he meant anything to the man at all. They had caused him to seriously reconsider their relationship or whatever it was they had. The biggest problem was he had real feelings for the man despite everything. Those feelings were strong enough that before he made any decision he had to know if he had any future with Jack. All evidence suggested he didn't but he wanted to hear him say so.

He started to undress, and let out a sharp breath as felt his resolve. One more chance; he would make Jack listen to him, give him a chance like Jack had given him had after Lisa. There was always the possibility he was wrong; maybe he was being oversensitive or misreading things. Or perhaps there could well be something going on for Jack he had missed or was unaware of. Tomorrow he told himself. Jack had said he would make time, tomorrow.

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Racing down the corridor, Ianto chased the man who had just pointed a gun to his head and pulled the trigger. He caught up with him and spun him around, and there was scuffle as they fought each other. Struggling as he tried to grab the man's arm, a slice of fire near his midriff caused him to momentarily let go. The man twisted and took off back down the corridor. Cursing Ianto ignored the pain and chased after him. As he turned the corner he saw the man dive into an office. Reaching the office door he kicked it in to see the man on the floor stuffing money into a bag.

"Pray you survive," Ianto snarled at him, pressing the stun gun to his head and pulled the trigger. Turning, he now raced back to Owen who was arranging to kill the creature in the warehouse. Following behind he watched as Owen put it out of its misery. He stood panting to catch his breath and felt warm wetness trickling down his hip.

"Owen...Rhys," Jack commanded the medic and indicated to the fallen man who had been shot.

"You okay Tosh?" Jack checked as he looked towards Tosh.

"Yeah I'm fine, bit shaken but okay," she told him as she glanced across at Ianto who was standing right next her looking pale and spaced out.

"I'm going to take Gwen and Rhys back to the Hub with Owen," Jack told her.

"Ianto, Tosh, make sure no trace of the alien remains then retcon the workers," he charged, throwing a vial towards him. Reaching up Ianto tried but a sharp pain pulled at his side and he winced and fumbled the catch. The vial fell to the ground and he scrambled to pick it up. When he stood up he saw Jack was helping Gwen to her feet and together they helped Rhys stand as Owen attended him.

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Stepping back, both Ianto and Tosh watched as the giant creature turned to dust along with all the bales of meat from throughout the warehouse. They had been so busy, this was the first time they had stopped even for a moment.

"Are you okay Ianto? You look like you're in pain," Tosh asked as she saw Ianto favouring his left side and limping.

"It's nothing Tosh," he told her.

She looked sceptically at him. "Let me see," she said not going to take no for an answer. He pulled away as he did her hand brushed his coat. She looked down to see a smudge of blood.

"You're injured," she said concerned.

"It's just a scratch, it's a bit painful that's all," he told her as they now started to make their way out.

"Oh no it's not that easy ,I need to look." She pulled back his coat as he tried to object. His shirt was ripped and blood-soaked across his back and side.

"When did this happen?" Tosh asked him as she saw him wince.

"It was earlier, I think one of the blokes I was chasing had a knife," he told her as she gently eased his shirt out of his trousers. "I mean it hurt at the time, but we had so much clean up to do, I didn't want to say anything. It's just a scratch, feels much worse than it is."

"Ianto this is serious. You have a deep laceration right into the muscle. No wonder it hurts. Let's get you back the Hub," she told him.

"What about the rest of the clean up?" he said when he saw she was not taking no for an answer.

"I'll sort that out Ianto, we need to get back so Owen can check you out," she said kindly as she assisted him to her car.

Driving with speed but as much care as she could they arrived back and she parked in the Hub garage. She helped him out of the car as he had stiffened up during the drive. They opened the door to shouting, it was clear a major row was going on.

**"**I wouldn't know anything different," Gwen bellowed at Jack.

"I would," Jack replied forcefully staring her down as he took a deep breath. "Give Rhys my love and I will see you tomorrow," he said through his teeth then as she left he went to his office and turned on the CCTV monitor, sat back in his chair glaring at the screen.

Tosh heard Ianto take a sharp in breath at Jack's declaration as she led him over to the medical bay and helped him sit on the examination table. Owen was clearing up and she help him ease off his jacket.

"Fuck," Owen said when he examined the wound. It was a clean cut but ran from his midriff to his back, around seven inches long and oozing blood. Moving around the medical bay he placed local antiseptic and sutures into a kidney bowl and placed them on the table. Then up he pulled out iodine, wipes and gloves.

He handed Tosh some medical scissors and she cut the shirt off then threw it on the floor.

"I need you to lie down," Owen told him as both he and Tosh assisted him into a comfortable position.

"I'm got spare clothes in my locker," Ianto told Tosh. She now left and went to their locker room as she tried to contain her fury. Right now she would like nothing more than to storm into Jack's office and give him the full measure of her wrath but her priority was Ianto. Opening Ianto's locker she took out his spare shirt and jacket. Returning, she glanced over to Jack's office to see him still absorbed in the CCTV monitor.

Injecting several jabs of local around the wound Owen waited for it to take effect. Several moments later he touched the wound to check it was numb.

"If you feel anything other than pressure you need to tell me. Now this is going to feel cold," he told him. He poured on a measure of iodine across the wound then, taking a series of wipes he cleaned up in and around the laceration. He then assisted Ianto into a sitting position.

"I need you here," Owen indicated to Tosh where to stand. He lifted Ianto's left arm and placed on her shoulder so he could have complete access to suture up the wound.

"I'm going to need to put in two levels of stiches, first to anchor the muscle then to close it up," he informed him as he began the delicate work. "How did you get the bruising on your arms and back?" he asked. Several large bruises were now colouring up around the top of his arms and what looked like a boot print between his shoulder blades.

"While I was tied up one of the brothers decided to express his displeasure," Ianto told him, fatigue and pain evident in his voice.

"Anything else I should know about?" Owen asked as he continued to work.

"One of them kicked me in the right knee," Ianto told him. Tosh pulled up his trouser leg to see; it looked swollen and black.

"I need to report this to Jack," Owen told him as he concentrated.

"Don't tell him, not tonight" Ianto asked them. Both Tosh and Owen exchanged looks as they both glanced over at his office see him still totally absorbed in the CCTV screen.

"He needs to know Ianto. I'm taking you off active duty as of now and I don't want to see you back in for at least five days," Owen told him sternly.

"No point, he won't care any way," Ianto told him as he swallowed. "I've decided to take the job offer from Torchwood House. I going to hand my notice in tomorrow."

Owen and Tosh glanced at each other again. "I'm not happy, I should inform him tonight. He needs to know in case there's a call out," Owen told him

"I know I'm putting you into an awkward position, but I'm asking you just for tonight," Ianto told him. "I need some space to get my head sorted."

"Alright, I'll see him first thing tomorrow," Owen told him. He changed needles and began to final stage of the suturing.

"I'm pleased you decided to take the offer. I think it's a great opportunity go somewhere you'll be appreciated," Tosh told him. She continued to hold up his arm as she glanced over to Jack's office.

"About bloody time," Owen said in agreement. Placing in the final stitch he glanced over to see Jack now sitting staring into space.

Bringing her attention back, Tosh helped Ianto down of the table. "Let's get you home," Tosh said gently.

Owen glared at the office. He was furious with Jack and himself. He should have checked Ianto himself instead of allowing Jack to divert his attention because Rhys had been shot.

As bad as his own negligence was he couldn't understand Jack's treatment of Ianto. Most of the time he ignored him, other times he was completely dismissive. Jack's actions in the past weeks culminating into today had shown how little regard he had for the young Welshman. He knew Ianto had agonised over his decision to leave not wanting to desert two workmates he had forged a camaraderie of suffering with in Jack's absence.

Both he and Tosh had entreated him to accept the offer. It was perfect for him. Ianto remained for only one reason: Jack. He and Tosh could see that all the feelings were on Ianto's side but being the kind of person he was he kept hanging on in the hope things would change. Well the events of today had made Jack's feelings towards Ianto so clear it was impossible to interpret them in any way. Ianto came last in Jack's life on every possible level. Well tomorrow Ianto would making his move to get out of this shit hole and he prayed and hoped he would finally find someone who deserved him.

Turning around, Jack noted the lights had gone dim. He looked at his watch. He got up and walked around. '_Where was Ianto, didn't he had something important he needed to talk to him about?'_ he asked himself as he went back to his desk and flicked on the monitor in the garage. Tosh's car was still there, so it looked like they might have all gone for a drink and he felt a sense of annoyance, '_Ianto could at least have dropped him off a final cup of coffee considering what a rough day it had been and said good night. Wasn't that two nights in a row he had left without saying good night'_ he thought. '_What the hell was that about_?' Well no doubt he would hear about it tomorrow. Stretching he made his way down to his bunker.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

His hands shaking, Ianto printed out his letter of resignation. He felt a whole mix of emotions as Tosh took the letter from the printer and handed it to him to sign. It was a mix of sadness, regret, disappointment, anger, resentment, stupidity for believing Jack and relief he had finally made a decision.

This was the final act of months of unhappiness, doubt, and indecision. If nothing else today had shown that whatever he thought was between him and Jack was gone or had never been there in the first place.

With a flourish he wrote his signature. Folding the letter he placed it in the envelope and wrote 'Captain Jack Harkness' on the front. Turning back to the computer he now called up the email he had set up weeks ago and pressed send.

"All done," he said looking up at Tosh as he handed over the letter.

"I'll put this on his desk. Now where is your spare bedding?" she asked him as she helped him stand.

"You don't need to stay Tosh, I'll be fine," he told her.

"You're going to need someone here, especially tomorrow morning. Right now you're full of pain pills, and beside that someone should be here with you tonight," she told him as he frowned.

"Large cupboard in the hall is the linen closet. There's a spare sleeping bag and pillow," he told her, too tired, sore, and upset to fight.

"I'll sort myself out in a moment. Bed for you first," she ordered.

He made his way to his bedroom and closed the door. Walking to the cupboard she opened the door and noted the tidy layers of expertly folded linen. Ianto was such a precise person, careful in all he did. She couldn't understand Jack's treatment of him. Ianto was first in, last to leave, he anticipated what was required before it was asked for, and yet as far as Jack was concerned he didn't even rate a thank you, well not lately. God knew what was going on in Jack's mind and to be truthful she didn't care.

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><p>Lying on his back in bed Ianto waited for the pain pills Tosh had given him to take effect. He was so sore he could hardly move. Tosh had offered to make him some breakfast but at the moment he didn't think he could face anything beyond the coffee he had taken a few sips of.<p>

His mobile rang; reaching out he picked it from his bed side table, and he saw it was from Jack. He diverted the call to voice mail. He was in no state to talk to Jack and he closed his eyes. A few moments later his mobile went off again. Seeing the caller ID he turned his phone off.

He lay there a while longer when he felt a pressure on his bladder. Not sure if the pain pills had kicked in, he decided he had to move. Using his right hand as not to put pressure on his left side he pulled himself up. Grapping his light dressing gown he struggled to put it on then made his way to the bathroom.

Flushing the toilet, he heard a banging on the door. He recognised the knock and cursed.

Groaning he made his way slowly to the front door as the pounding continued.

"I'm coming," he shouted out angrily as he reached the lounge and the pounding stopped. Reaching the door he opened it and saw Jack standing there, his legs apart, fury written on every line of his face.

"You send me a letter, you resign and can't even come in tell me to my face," Jack spat out at him as he pushed past.

"Jack I've been offered a job…" Ianto started to say as he closed the door and faced him.

"You should have come to see me and told me in person," Jack interrupted waving the letter at Ianto.

"I've been offered a job at Torchwood House…" Ianto stated to explain. "I've been trying for weeks to talk to you about it. I had to give a reply by today," Ianto told him wearily.

"What kind of job?" Jack demanded.

"I'm not sure I'm comfortable talking to you about this right now," Ianto told him

"What does that mean?" Jack snapped.

"It means I'm not up to talking today, not that we ever talk." Ianto said. Feeling weak he went into the kitchen to find some way to support himself. He knew he should sit down but he wanted to stand for this so he lent against the kitchen counter.

"My door is always open you know that, there was no excuse for not coming to discuss this with me. If you had a problem you should have come and spoken to me first," Jack retorted.

Ianto shook his head sadly. "No Jack! The door is open for Owen, Tosh, and especially for Gwen, but not for me," he replied raising his voice as he gripped the counter.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jack threw back.

"I've tried to talk to you for weeks, but every time you made an excuse or you're too busy, or something more important came up. Then yesterday I realised I didn't need to speak to you because your actions made it clear where I stand with you," Ianto told him.

"Yesterday?" Jack echoed, confused.

"I didn't want to accept the offer until I had spoken to you to find out where I stood with you, about us. Yesterday was when I finally realised that whatever I thought was going on between you and me wasn't real," Ianto told him. Taking a sharp intake of breath he continued, "then I walked in on your row with Gwen… "

"So that's what this is about? This is why you're are sulking at home instead of coming into work and getting Tosh to hand in your resignation because of some argument I was having with Gwen?" Jack spat out.

"Yes Jack, I'm taking the day off because I'm annoyed with you over Gwen," Ianto snarked as he glared at him.

"I want an explanation why you didn't see fit to tell me to my face," Jack demanded.

"Jack, this is not the right time or place," Ianto struggled to say.

"I'm not going until you give me an explanation," Jack told him looking stubborn. "We are going to talk now or you can come into the Hub and we will talk there, but talk we will," Jack shouted stabbing a finger at Ianto as he spoke. He moved towards him pushing his face into his.

Ianto staggered as he stepped back. As he did Jack went to catch him. Ianto grunted in pain as his knee twisted. Trying to steady him Jack put his hand on his waist. Drawing back at Ianto's grimace of pain Jack pulled his hand away in confusion.

He looked at his hand and he saw faint trace of blood on it. Only now did he see the wound pad. He was about to say something when Owen burst through the front door. He took one look at Ianto and pushed Jack out of the way. "For fuck's sake Jack," he shouted at him as he helped Ianto to the sofa.

"He's injured, when did this happen?" Jack said bewildered. He looked at the blood on his hand and then towards Ianto who being examined by Owen.

"Listen Harkness, you can stand there and shut up or fuck off," he warned him forcefully as he pulled back Ianto dressing gown to see the wound pad was showing evidence of fresh bleeding.

"Shit," Owen burst out. Tosh now raced through the door, saw Jack, and pushed him strongly with both hands. He staggered back, and then she went to see what she could do to help.

Opening his doctor's bag Owen placed it on the coffee table. Then he went quickly to the kitchen and washed his hands then returned and started to remove the wound dressing, exposing the wound.

"It's looking good. I thought for a moment you had torn the stiches, but you must rest in bed like I ordered," he told him. He replaced the wound pad and examined the bruising.

"Got a beauty coming up on your back Ianto? Perfect boot print, he must have really put the boot in," Owen told him.

"Don't make me laugh Owen it hurts too much," Ianto told him grimacing.

"Not that you've got a lot to laugh about," Owen said, throwing a look at Jack who was standing there looking more and more disturbed as the full extent of Ianto's injuries became clear. "Knee's still swollen, you need to keep off it," he told him as he helped him stand.

"Now back to bed," Owen asked him. He now helped him into the bed room, then pulled back the covers and helped him get in. "Now lay there and don't move unless one of us brings you something to eat, drink or you need to get up and use the toilet," he warned him as he walked out and closed the door.

Tuning to Tosh he pulled out a prescription pad from his bag and started to write out a prescription.

"I'll go and get that," Jack offered.

"No you won't. Tosh will," he said as he tore off the top sheet and handed it to Tosh. "When you get back here, he is to have two of each. It's strong I know, but he's in a lot of pain, and I want him to sleep. When he wakes up if it's been three hours give him the same. Try and get him to drink and eat something other than coffee. Have you any idea what he likes?" he asked Tosh.

"Fresh orange juice, extra pulp and bagels," Jack spoke up then went back to biting his bottom lip.

"Some juice and bagels then. If the pain medication I have prescribed is not strong enough then call me," he told her. She nodded took her bag and raced out the door.

Clearing up the discarded wound pad, Owen glared at Jack.

"There's some cream cheese and jam in the fridge he might like as well," Jack said as he headed for the kitchen and opened the fridge to check. "You should have told me," he said as he closed the fridge door.

"I was my way in to tell you when you screamed out the Hub. I would have been here a lot quicker if I hadn't got stuck behind a bloody great lorry blocking the whole bloody street," he told him.

"What happened?" Jack asked still reeling.

" I will give you a full debrief back at the Hub and you and me are going to have a talk," Owen told him pointing to the door as Jack went to say something, stopped, looked towards the bedroom, hesitated, then left.

Waiting until Tosh returned, he looked at her as she entered, letting out a long sigh. "Call me if he needs anything," he said as Tosh gave him a thumbs up.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Jack pulled on the hand brake and paused before he leapt out of the SUV. His head was swirling. He had only read the first part of Ianto's letter and was so angry he had stormed out the Hub to confront him. Now he was coming to the realisation he had seriously fucked up. He had no idea he had been injured. As he went back over the events of yesterday he realised he hadn't even noticed him coming back into the Hub let along being treated. How had he missed it? It would have been in full view.

Striding across the Hub Jack saw Owen had returned and indicated he should follow him to his office.

"Ianto was injured and you didn't tell me," Jack stated the facts.

"As if you care," Owen replied bluntly.

"You don't think I care for Ianto?" Jack asked, stunned.

"No," Owen told him, trying to keep his voice steady because he knew he was seriously going to lose it.

"I want a full report," Jack told him, not allowing himself to show how much Owen's reply bothered him.

Crossing his arms Owen gave him a full report of Ianto's injuries and how they had been sustained.

"I've taken him off active duty. He is to remain at home for at least five days. He can come back to work depending on how he feels, which I am sure he will considering what a conscientious bugger he is. If he does it's to be light duties only, eight to five, no late nights or weekends, half days if necessary," Owen told him.

"Agreed," Jack said as he saw the look of disgust on Owen's face. "I do care, I care for him a lot," Jack told him.

"Yeah we've all seen how much you care," Owen snarked doing air quotes around the word 'care'.

"What does that supposed to mean?" Jack barked out.

"Look Jack, Ianto is good at making himself invisible. Yesterday was a prime example, but even I've noticed how unhappy he's been, especially since you blew him off over the weekend you planned."

"We talked about that, he was okay about it," Jack explained.

"So the excited conversations he had with me and Tosh, telling us all about how much he was looking forward to it, followed by the deafening silence and hiding in the archives, when you blew him off didn't get your attention?" Owen said exasperated.

"He said he was okay about it," Jack repeated stubbornly.

"Ianto says lots of things. Oh he put a brave face on for you, made a whole pile of excuses and justifications to us, but he was hurt."

"We spoke; he was okay with it and I promised to make it up to him," Jack said now getting annoyed as he tried to get his point across.

"And have you made it up to him?" Owen asked him.

"I was going to. I got a couple of ideas, I don't go on holiday with just anyone, he should know that," Jack replied.

"No you take Gwen instead," Owen told him as Jack threw a sharp look at him.

"That was not a holiday it was a UNIT conference, she went as my P.A," Jack told him. Owen shook his head and glared at him, his arms crossed.

"He was injured and you didn't tell me why?" Jack repeated his earlier question after several awkward moments passed.

"He asked me not to and considering what a horrible day he had I could hardly blame him," Owen told him.

"I should have been told," Jack retorted.

"What, so you could make him feel worse by offering to take him home and then leave so you could race back here and continue Gwen gazing on the CCTV? I don't think he could take it, not after yesterday." Owen shouted at him.

"That is not fair," Jack retorted.

"Okay, then where is Gwen today?" he asked him flat out.

"I told her to take the weekend off to stay with Rhys to make sure he was okay," he replied quietly as he understood the implications.

"Fucking knife wound, 17 fucking stiches, kicked about, tied up, gun to his head, beaten up and I'm betting you never even noticed he was gone, until you wanted something," Owen said furiously. "And if that wasn't bad enough, what does he have to walk in on? You declaring to Gwen she's the most important person in the universe and he's standing right there and you didn't even look at him."

Jack sat down then. He held his elbow, closed his eyes and covered his mouth with his hand.

"I'm not feeling particular clever about this situation either, I should have checked everyone before I left the warehouse. The one good thing about all this will be his last field mission before he leaves," Owen added.

"Would that work, taking him off field ops? Do you think he would be stay if he didn't have to go out in the field?" Jack asked quietly, still trying to come to terms with the events of the morning and insight to why Ianto felt he had to leave.

"What, take away his only opportunity to get out of this shit hole so he's stuck here all the time?" Owen snapped back. "Ianto is a superb field operative. He really came into himself when you went AWOL, not that you've noticed."

"I did notice," Jack replied strongly now looking directly at Owen.

"Did you?" Owen snapped back just as strongly, "And how would he know?"

"I'm always telling you guys what a great job you do," Jack told him. He saw Owen shake his head.

"No Jack, you tell Gwen and in passing you throw the odd platitude my and Tosh's way but I have never been witness to any situation you have actually told Ianto he has done a good job, not here in the Hub or out in the field," Owen told him.

"I can't show favouritism in the field, if I make big deal of him in front of you guys then it makes it seem like I'm…" Jack said as Owen interjected.

"Why doesn't that apply to Gwen then? You're always telling her what a good job she does, making sure you're always together in the field. She's always in your office, sitting on the edge of your desk while you have your little chit chats, private jokes and knowing looks. Ianto walks in and you don't even look at him. Are you fucking her?" Owen asked Jack out right.

"No," he spluttered as his eyes widened in shock at the suggestion.

"But you'd like to," Owen threw back.

Jack reacted as he saw the truth of his statement.

"Then you are a bloody fool," he said as he saw Jack bite his lip.

"If I find out you somehow fucked up this opportunity for him, you will have me to deal with. Because I know you Harkness, I can see your mind working; a call here, an email there, and suddenly the job offer is rescinded, and he's stuck here watching the Gwen and Jack show."

"I won't," Jack said looking down not wanting to admit that was exactly what he had been thinking.

"Good, now I need to call Tosh and check up on him, and for Christ sake Jack read the rest of his fucking letter before you go racing up there guns blazing again trying to fix this because you can't," he said leaving.

Jack sat forward and picked up the letter and read it line for line. Five minutes later he put the letter back down, stood up, taking his coat, and started to head towards the Hub garage.

"You're not going to try and see him are you because if you are…?" Owen warned as he passed.

"I need to think. You can reach me on my mobile if there's a Rift alert. I just really need to think," he said as he passed on his way to the garage.

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><p>Standing on the top of the tallest building in Cardiff Jack looked out with unseeing eyes as he went over the events of the past twenty four hours. He berated himself; he should have seen Ianto was injured. He was there; he saw how Ianto was treated. Ianto had been incredibly courageous and if he hadn't acted as he had who knew what the outcome would have been? Would it have been so difficult to just check he was alright?<p>

His behaviour he realised was part of a pattern he was only now coming to recognise. He had been deliberately distancing himself for weeks, months even. As a consequence he had treated Ianto very badly, undeservedly so to such a point he could no longer face working here, with Jack.

On a personal level he knew how mixed up he was inside and he knew this was due to the year that never was. The one thought he had kept him going during in his incarceration on the _Valiant_ was coming home and seeing his team, especially Ianto. On his return he had meant every word he had said about coming home for him. So why had he treated him like he didn't count? Complicating this was his feelings for Gwen. Did he have any real feelings for her? Or was it that she was someone who was a could've been if the circumstances had been right and was using her as an excuse for distancing himself from Ianto?

'_Had he used Ianto because he had been convenient and because he was there and willing?'_ he asked himself. He had certainly accepted Ianto's compliance on face value. Had he pushed him away emotionally because deep down he sensed Ianto wanted more and that scared him? Was that what was going on here? Had he treated Gwen the way he did because she had no power to hurt him but Ianto did? So he pulled Gwen closer and pushed Ianto away because he did have that power?

Where was Ianto in all this? Injured and left with the impression he didn't count on any level, his efforts unnoticed and unappreciated.

He had no idea how he was going to sort this out. Ianto leaving had never entered his mind, yet here it was in black and white. Ianto's letter had laid it out, in stark terms, Jack had failed him, not that he stated it outright but its polite language hit home more than any angry tirade would have.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four **

Two days Later

Seeing Owen and Tosh return from their morning visit checking on Ianto's progress Jack went to join them. Normally so decisive he was at a loss of what to do. Should he try and see him, stay away, offer to help, declare to Ianto how much meant to him, say nothing?

"How is he today?" Jack asked as he went to stand next Owen's desk.

"A lot better he had a good sleep last night and I made sure he had breakfast," Tosh told him.

"Does he need anything?" Jack asked. He saw Tosh shake her head.

"No we've seen to everything," Owen told him firmly leaving no doubt about how he felt about Jack's supposed concern.

"What do I do to fix this?" Jack asked them honestly. "I don't want Ianto to leave."

"This is not fixable. Ianto's moving on and after the last few months as much as I'm going to miss him, I'm happy he is going. And to be brutal I don't blame him. I would have walked out months ago if you had treated me like you treated him," Owen starkly pointed out.

"What's so sad Jack is he believes he has failed in some way, failed us and you," Tosh told him.

"He is not the failure here," Jack told them sadly.

"That's not how he sees it. He always feared that he wouldn't be enough and he was right." Tosh added.

"He was, he is enough," Jack reiterated.

"If that's true it's a shame you didn't show him that before it was too late then," Owen snapped back.

"Is it really too late, is there no way back?" Jack asked.

"Do you want the truth?" Tosh asked him bluntly and saw him take a sharp breath and nod his head.

"You sure Jack?" Owen checked.

"I can't fix this if I don't know," Jack told him as Tosh started to speak.

"After all that's happened I think Ianto still has feelings for you, but he is so hurt, because your every action has demonstrated how little he matters to you. From what he tells me all the feelings are on his side anyway because you've made it pretty evident who you would rather be with. So why should Ianto stay where he has to face you and Gwen every day?"

Owen took over. "None of us gets away with what Gwen does. She snaps her fingers and she gets whatever she wants whenever she wants it. She argues with you and you give in. Take the last couple of days for example, she's at home with Rhys because she stamps her foot and demands time off to look after him. I've never had a week off, neither has Tosh or Ianto, and what does she get? A bloody trip to Paris, courtesy of Captain Jack Harkness as an engagement gift." He took a deep breath and Tosh continued.

"You plan a weekend away with Ianto to attend some conference, when she finds out she storms into your office and makes a big fuss about how she should be there as your second in command and you throw over Ianto for her."

"Just so you know Ianto had plans that weekend, a surprise for you," Owen told him. Jack looked startled.

"What!" Jack burst out.

"He had found out there was a 1940's big band concert happening in the same city. He wanted it to be a surprise, to thank you for taking him away. He knew how much you would appreciate a real live band. He showed us the tickets and told us how he was going to spring the surprise on you," Owen explained. "We tried to persuade him to put tickets on eBay to recoup the cost. I asked him later if he had managed to sell them and told me he just tore them up," he added as he saw Jack's shoulders slump. Tosh now spoke.

"You know what makes this so sad Jack? Was that he appeared to have wanted so little in the first place. He told me recently that he would settle for the two of you just talking to each other over a coffee somewhere. So whatever you are thinking is too little too late," she said.

"You need to talk to him Jack, but to be quite honest I'm not sure anything you do or say is going to make any difference," Owen told him.

"Thank you," he said taking a sharp breath then turned and headed back to his office and closed the door.

"He had to be told," Owen said as Tosh nodded.

"It's just so sad," she said.

"I think he's a self-absorbed prick who's getting a long awaited comeuppance and to be honest I'm sick of the way he constantly favours Gwen. Much more and I'll fucking resign," Owen said as he turned toward the medical bay.

* * *

><p>Moving slowly Ianto made his way across to Jack's office. It was his first day back and he knew this was not going to be easy and be braced himself for the confrontation. In truth he didn't understand Jack's anger. He had made it very clear to him his value here and he couldn't see any point in remaining. He couldn't imagine what he had to say other than to lecture him about his responsibilities and ensure that Ianto left everything in good order before he left. He took a deep breath and knocked on the door.<p>

Standing as he entered, Jack pulled out a chair so that Ianto could sit down but to his dismay Ianto chose to remain standing.

"Ianto, somehow you have been left with the impression that you don't count, that your work here is not valued," he said. He saw Ianto nod.

"I and everyone here appreciates what you do. I assure you that the work we do would not be possible if not for your continued excellent efforts. No one works harder than you do and I'm sorry that I have not made it clear how much I and everyone here values what you do," Jack told him.

"Not everyone here appreciates what I do Jack. I know you don't and I think Gwen just considers me part of the furniture," he said. He saw Jack looked saddened as he realised his declaration had had no effect. "I don't count. I'm not important enough for you to bother putting yourself out for because that takes effort. It takes effort to look across a warehouse and see the person you're supposed to care about has been injured and might actually require your attention and help," Ianto said barely managing to keep his composure.

"You're right. I should have checked. I've spoken to Owen and from now on every field trip we will both ensure that no team member is left in such a situation again," Jack told him as he saw Ianto glare at him. "I don't know what else to say. I failed you, I should have checked you were okay and I want to assure you this will never happen again."

Ianto remained silent not trusting himself to speak at this point.

"I don't want you to leave is there anything I can do or say…?" Jack asked him after several uncomfortable moments had passed.

"I made it very clear in my letter why I can't work here. You say things will be different but I know the reality, in the long term nothing will change. Part of the problem is knowing that you say a lot of things, but then for one reason or another you never follow through. You say I'm valuable and essential to running operations when you and I both know the truth. I'm on the bottom on a long list of priorities here in the Hub with Gwen at the top. I finally got the message, I don't matter. I'm not someone you care about as a member of the team, a friend or as a lover," Ianto told him.

"It's not true you do matter," Jack told him struggling to cope with Ianto's words.

"You may not want to face the truth Jack, but whoever you need it's not me, on a professional or personal level. The person you want you can't have. As a consequence you overcompensate by consistently favouring her over every staff member especially me," Ianto told him sighing out loud.

"You are important to me," Jack stuttered. "I don't want you to leave; I promise I will do better, a lot better."

"You forget I've had the 'I pledge to make you a priority in my life' speech. I know that any words you say are basically meaningless. I can't imagine your actions being any clearer," Ianto said struggling to breathe. "Now I need to go because I'm beginning to lose it. Gwen will be in soon and I just don't think I can handle being round either of you, so have we finished?"

"There really is nothing I can do, is there?" Jack asked quietly.

"No," Ianto added as he turned and left.

* * *

><p>Evening, a few days later.<p>

Watching from his office Jack observed Ianto has he moved around, picking up files in preparation of returning them to the archives. Jack glanced away, not wanting Ianto to see he was watching him.

He never appreciated just how much he had come to rely on Ianto's company. No matter how early he woke Ianto would appear with a fresh of mug of coffee. Often it was accompanied with some tasty breakfast roll or cinnamon swirl from the bakery across the Plass. It was just one of the many small things Ianto had done for him during each day, making his life that much more bearable. So when had he stopped acknowledging the special nature of this element of Ianto's personality that drove him to show he cared in little moments like that?

Now he recognized he had drawn back unconsciously a fragment a time until he had just seen Ianto as just there as if his actions were some sort of obligation rather than the special tokens they were. Ianto had treated him like a lover making sure Jack knew how much he had cared for him. In return he hadn't even taken the man on the date he had promised.

He saw Ianto move to the coffee machine and knew he was setting up to make Jack a final drink before he departed. It was seven in the evening and Owen would eat his hide if Ianto became overtired. He had taken a half day starting later and Jack hoped to take the opportunity to see if there was anything he could to stop him leaving.

Jack looked up as Ianto entered and placed a file on his desk followed by a mug of coffee. He reached out but Ianto moved his hand away quickly to ensure they didn't touch.

"Please don't go," Jack begged as Ianto let out a huge sigh.

"I need to go Jack. I have no reason to stay. I wasted months in the hope things would improve but now I know there's no future here. I need to move on to somewhere I'm not constantly being taken for granted, and I want a life Jack; going out, seeing people…" he trailed off.

"Everyone here respects what you do," Jack said looking up.

"You know full well that's not true," Ianto told him directly.

"You are vital to the operations of this facility. You are the heart of what happens here," Jack told him.

"Janet's further up the food chain than I am. Even Myfanwy had more time with you that I have had over the past months and anyway I'm replaceable," Ianto told him.

"You are not replaceable!" Jack said struggling not to break down.

"So let's say I stay," Ianto suggested as a flash of hope crossed Jack's face. "I can't handle being around Gwen, the flirting and looks between you along with the favouritism are a constant reminder that I can't compete and she's won. Aside from that just knowing she is who you really want is hard to take. If I remain what do I have to face next? Walking in on the two of you fucking? Christ Jack how much do you think I can take?" Ianto cried out.

"I'll ask her to leave if that's what I need to do to get you to stay," Jack offered desperately.

"What possible kind of future could we have built on knowing I was the cause of you losing the person you really want?" Ianto told him.

"I don't want Gwen," Jack tried to argue.

"You know I don't believe that," Ianto burst out.

When he saw Jack was not going to argue he continued, "Secondly, your suggestion is not fair on Gwen. It's not her fault you constantly favour her over everyone here, that's your fault. The best thing for everyone is for me to remove myself from this situation. Once I'm gone you're free from any obligation. There will be no ex- lover or whatever it was we had, holding you back. But I do have one request," Ianto said. He took a deep breath.

"Anything if it's in my power to grant," Jack said honestly

"Over the next few weeks, I'll try and stay out of your way as much as possible. If you could hold off on moving in on Gwen until after I leave…?" He caught a sob in his throat. "I know it's hard to ask considering your past behaviour but if you could just tone it down in my presence until after I leave, so I don't have to face a constant reminder of how complete my failure actually is?" Ianto told him as a traitorous tear rolled down his face and he hurriedly wiped it away.

"I promise and for what it's worth Ianto, I'm sorry that I have failed you so badly," Jack managed to croak out.

"Thank you Jack," Ianto replied ignoring the second part of Jack's statement. He spun on his heel and he left to continue his preparations for leaving.

Jack felt tears dripping down his face on to his desk but made no move to wipe them away. He listened as he heard main Hub door roll as Ianto left. After a few moments he pulled the keyboard of his computer towards him. There was nothing he could do to change the terrible circumstances of the tragedy he had wrought but he could do one thing. He would ensure that the staff at Torchwood House knew what an amazing and incredible human being they were taking on.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five.**

Going through the paperwork on his desk Jack glanced up to see Ianto in front of him, his face was red and blotchy as if he had been crying.

"I'm sorry to bother you Sir, I know I promised to keep out of your way…," he said hesitantly not sure how Jack was going to react.

"What's happened?" Jack asked wondering what could have occurred to upset the normally stoic young man.

"I've just heard my Aunt Lily has died," Ianto said looking down at his shoes as he fought back tears.

"I'm very sorry to hear that," Jack said standing and giving Ianto his complete attention as he tried to remember if Ianto had ever mentioned her to him. "Was this expected, had she been ill?" Jack asked not sure how much to say in case he exposed how little he knew about Ianto's family.

"No one's sure. She collapsed while she out shopping. They rushed her to…." Ianto stopped as he took a sharp breath. "She died in the ambulance," he said, composing himself. Jack attempted to lay his hand on his arm but Ianto stepped away.

"This is awkward, I realise that this is short notice but I need four days off," Ianto said awkwardly looking up.

"Of course, take as much time as you need," Jack replied instantly.

"I only need four days. The trouble is I have to go now. My Aunt was my only living relative so there is no one else. I need to take care of things, arrange for her funeral, pack up her house, settle her affairs that sort of thing," Ianto tried to explain.

"Do you need some support, I could come with you?" Jack offered.

"I appreciate the offer, but I've asked Tosh and she said she would come up on the day of the funeral. And to be honest I need someone who will actually turn up," Ianto told him bluntly. He saw Jack flinch.

"Let me know and I'll make sure Tosh is free," Jack told him, smarting from Ianto's reply. "Who's coming with you today? Jack asked seeing how shaken Ianto appeared.

"I've a friend here who's in the force; Andy. He's picking me up shortly, he'll drive me up as he was the one to call and tell me," Ianto told him.

"Look after yourself. If you need more time off or you need anything just call me," Jack said, and Ianto left his office. He closed his eyes as he realised this incident had brought into sharp relief how little he knew about Ianto. Only living relative...he had hardly mentioned his family. What a mess, he thought. Tosh followed in as Ianto left.

"You've spoken to Ianto," she said gearing herself up for a fight. "I know it's not much notice but I need to take a day off sometime next week," Tosh told him her tone indicating she was not going to accept a refusal.

"It's okay," Jack told her. He saw her surprised reaction.

"But I thought Gwen had asked for time off next week, and with Ianto being gone we going to be shorthanded," she told him.

"Oh I forgot about that," Jack told her, recalling Gwen had asked for leave.

"I don't know what Ianto told you but they were very close. She brought him up after his parents were killed when he was ten. He tried to see her as much as possible but with his job here and everything, and now she's died suddenly..." she raced on trying to make her case.

"We'll cope, take as much time as you need," he told her gently.

"Really?" she replied.

"I'm not that callous," Jack snapped back.

"Well you didn't care when you overrode his leave when he had arranged to take her out to celebrate her birthday, earlier in the year," she retorted.

"He never said what the leave was for," Jack told her as he looked at her distressed.

"That may be, but she was like his mother. He knew she wasn't well and he's been trying to visit but you know how things have been," she told him.

"If you can let me know which day Tosh, that would be great," Jack told her sadly confirming his agreement.

"Thank you, I know how much Ianto will appreciate some support," Tosh said surprised Jack had acquiesced so quickly.

* * *

><p>"How was the funeral" Jack asked as he joined Tosh by her desk.<p>

"Very sad. Ianto put a brave face on like he always does but it was a hard day," Tosh told him. "I think he appreciated that I could join him so he wasn't on his own," she added as they now saw Ianto enter the Hub carrying a small holdall bag with handles and a centre zip.

"How are you Ianto?" Jack asked him kindly as he passed.

"I'm okay, the funeral was the worst part. I only have a few things left to do, sign a few documents, get her house up ready for sale that sort of thing. I'll just make a round of coffees and be out of your way," he added as he headed for the kitchen placing the bag down carefully.

Shaking his head sadly Jack went back to his office and closed the door. A couple of hours later Jack headed down to the archives. As he approached he heard a scampering scuffling noise. When he turned the corner, Ianto was standing by his desk zipping up the bag he had been carrying earlier.

"Can I help you sir?" Ianto asked.

"I just wanted to see how you were?" Jack asked after several awkward moments passed.

"I'm fine, I guess it comes under as good as can be expected," Ianto told him.

"I didn't know about your Aunt," Jack confessed.

"Well I didn't really tell you about her. I wasn't sure you'd be interested," Ianto told him. "I mean you never told me anything about your family. I figured I wasn't the person you wanted to share yourself with," Ianto replied.

"Why didn't you tell me about her birthday?" Jack asked him outright.

"No point Jack, as you said at the time, I had to think of the team. You couldn't show favouritism and couldn't be seen giving me priority over the others and that as a Torchwood operative I was obligated to be called out," Ianto struggled on.

"It would have helped if you had told me. I would never have called you in had I known," Jack told him cringing inwardly as he recalled the conversation.

"Doesn't matter Jack, I mean how could I expect you to understand? I mean you never showed any indication that family matters to you, oh …" Ianto stopped as he became distressed.

"I've upset you," Jack said stating the obvious.

"I suddenly realised it was only my family you weren't interested in. I mean you ask the others about their families all the time." He took a deep breath. "What did you come down her for?" he added looking at him angrily.

"I came to say I was sorry Ianto you should have told me," Jack replied.

"Would it have made any difference?" Ianto asked him.

"Of course it would!" Jack told him indignantly.

"I don't believe you, because you've managed to postpone and override every leave I've booked since you came back. I imagine it never crossed your mind it could be important considering I never book leave for anything other than something vital. " He let out a deep sigh. "At the time I was so worn down with it all I thought there was no point in telling you because you wouldn't have given a damn about anything that was important to me," he said glaring at him.

"You should have told me Ianto," Jack raised his voice.

"Okay let me ask you something. Did you ever occur to you to ask me why I needed the time off?" Ianto asked him.

"That's not the point Ianto, I not psychic," Jack retorted.

"I think the one thing we can all agree on is you are not psychic," Ianto snarked.

"I came down here to say I was sorry," Jack told him.

"Sorry that I got to disappoint a much loved Aunt or sorry you feel guilty about it?" Ianto said furiously. "Because I don't want your apology Jack. You gave me all the justifications at the time along with a promise you would make it up to me then."

"Then let me make this up to you," Jack offered desperately wanting to find any way to do just that.

"What, like a meal or a weekend away?" Ianto retorted.

"Okay," Jack replied.

"I'm afraid my aunts dead now, any enjoyment she might have had for such a gesture has passed," Ianto snapped back as he saw Jack colour. "Now get out of my archives," Ianto shouted as a noise that sounded suspiciously like a bark appeared to come from the bag.

"Was that a bark I heard?" Jack said as the bag moved. He heard another muffled bark. "What is in the bag?" Jack asked.

Ianto looked horribly embarrassed. He unzipped the bag and the head of a tiny tea cup Yorkshire terrier popped out, complete with pink ribbon on the top of its head. "Meet 'Spud' short for Spudelicious," Ianto said picking her up. She proceeded to lick his face with great enthusiasm.

"It's a dog," Jack said, raising his eyebrows. "A tiny dog." The small animal quivered with the delight of the attention she was receiving.

"I didn't know what else to do. She won't let me leave her on her own. If I do she just cries. If she can just stay for today I'll try and find somewhere she can go," Ianto asked almost pleading. "It's just she was my Aunt's dog and she's been pining. I called up the doggy day care place but there are no places at the moment."

"Are you expecting that I would ask you to get rid of her?" Jack interrupted him, thinking this was the most adorable sight as Spud looked in his direction her whole body wiggling with excitement.

"Well I mean it's not like pets are allowed and I'm not in a position to ask for any favours," Ianto told him.

"I'm not sure what hurts me the most Ianto, the fact you couldn't just come and ask so you felt you had to smuggle her in or that you believe I would say no," he told him honestly.

"So she can stay?" Ianto said looking at him holding on the retort he felt come onto his lips. "I'll try my best to find someone to take her."

"Ianto, if she needs to come in with you, it's fine for as long as necessary," Jack told him.

"I promise she will be no bother, you won't even know she's here," Ianto said as he put her down and she started to sniff Jack's boot then bounded away looked back and bounced back with the delight only a puppy can show.

"I'm serious about the meal and the weekend away," Jack told him as they watched Spud race around.

"No point in me going away somewhere on my own. When you first suggested the idea I wanted to go away with you even if it was just a conference because I took it as some kind of evidence you wanted to move what we had beyond shagging, but then you took Gwen." He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "As for the meal why don't you save it and arrange to take everyone out for a nice meal sometime later in the year, say around Christmas, then make it an annual event to say thank you to everyone for a job well done," Ianto suggested.

"I could set something up as a good bye," Jack offered.

"I'd rather not to be quite honest. I don't think I could handle a big fuss. Tosh and Owen are helping me move so I'll say my good bye to them then," he told Jack who looked like he had shrunk in on himself.

"I understand," Jack said as he turned away and headed back to his office. Closing the door to his office he flicked on the CCTV and sat back as he watched Ianto working in the archives. As Spud raced around, Ianto sat at his desk and burst into tears. Jack gulped, this was terrible, every day brought some new information of how much he had let him down and he felt so powerless to do anything.

His thoughts on the roof came to him. When he had stood there he had felt so conflicted between who he wanted. It was too late now to recognise that his wanting Gwen was an excuse for not making any form of commitment, as a way of protecting himself from getting hurt. He was sure Ianto still had some feelings for him but his actions has shown the man how little true regard he held for him and he felt ashamed of himself. Ianto has asked for so little, what had it been a meal and a weekend away.

He cringed as he recalled Gwen's jubilation on her return, as she had told everyone who was within earshot describing every detail, of the important people she had rubbed shoulders with or the evening out including dinner and dancing. As he looked back now he realised he would rather have had Ianto by his side and on his arm with his quiet supportive presence instead of the overbearing sycophantic Gwen. No wonder Ianto wanted to get as far away from here as he could.

What had Tosh said? Taking him out for a coffee would have done it. He couldn't even offer that now without it looking like it was contrived. He leaned forward and turned off the CCTV monitor. What was the point of torturing himself anymore? Ianto was leaving, he would try and make that as easy as possible. He could at least keep one promise he had made.

* * *

><p>Jack stood as Ianto entered his office for the last time. They stood awkwardly for a few moments.<p>

"I've handed in my security pass, gun and signed myself out," Ianto told him.

"I'm going to miss you," Jack said as he pulled Ianto into a hug. He lingered a little in the knowledge this was going to be his last physical contact with him.

"You know I'm going to miss this place too," Ianto said as they pulled back. "I feel like I spent a life time down here."

"If things don't work out at Torchwood Two there will always be place for you here," Jack told him.

"Thanks," Ianto added.

"Look I know we're not parting on the best of terms but I wanted to give you something," Jack told him as he opened his desk and brought out a small jeweller's box. "Don't open it here," Jack asked him as Ianto took the gift.

"Thanks," Ianto repeated not sure what to say.

"I got something for Spud as well," he told him as he handed over a small wrapped package. Ianto smiled as he opened it up and saw it was three doggy jumpers.

"It's cold where you're going and she's so tiny I thought this would keep her warm on all those early morning walks you take her on," Jack told him smiling warmly.

"She does love her morning walkies," Ianto said smiling. "I never saw myself as a dog person. But you know what? It's so nice having someone to come home to in the evenings. I guess I never realised how lonely I was. To her I'm the most important person in her life. It doesn't matter if I'm in a bad mood she's always so pleased to see me, so it's wonderful she's there," he expounded.

"Well I'm going to miss her too," Jack said honestly grateful that the small animal had made it possible for him and Ianto to have something to talk about over the past weeks that was neutral. Spud had been his excuse for spending as much time he could with Ianto, taking her a small snack or offering to take her round the Hub with him or just playing with her. She had even been the cause of them working together in a small way. Myfanwy had shown her immediate interest by circling around, then swooping down and almost snatching her. Her rescue had been the cause of a genuine moment of caring which for Jack had brought into sharp relief exactly what he was losing.

"I better go," Ianto said "Thanks for the gifts." He left the office. Taking a final look around he left by the main Hub door.

Watching his retreating back Jack leaned over and pulled out a bottle of scotch and a single glass. Pouring a measure he turned on the CCTV to watch as Ianto packed his car with the spare suit he kept in the Hub and got in.

Sitting in his car Ianto opened the box. He was not sure what Jack had given him; in truth he was not expecting anything. To his surprise he saw it was a gold fob watch and chain, an antique by the looks of it. He smiled; it would go perfectly with any of his suits. He opened it up and the read the inscription. Caught by surprise by its sentiment he felt tears run down his face. Wiping his face dry he took a deep breath and reminded himself of why he was leaving.

'_Easier said than done if you didn't love the man so much,'_ he told himself. He felt his heart ache at the realisation that Jack had never been his or ever would be. His heart belonged to another, no matter what Jack had done over the past few weeks or this small parting gift, no matter how touching, was going to change that. Placing the watch in the case he put his keys in the ignition. Starting up his car he drove out of the Torchwood garage without a backward glance.

End of Part One.

Continued in

Actions speak louder than words: Part Two. Restitution.


End file.
